Letting Go. Letting God.

The Lord is a stronghold for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble. And those who know your name put their trust in you, for you, O Lord, have not forsaken those who seek you. - Psalms 9:9-10 (NRSV)

True confession time again. I find it very hard to “put my trust in God.” I am enough of a skeptic, a pessimist, a doubter, and a whole lot of others things that make it hard to fully trust God. When I most need to let go and let God I am hesitant to do so. One of my favorite scenes in a movie is when Indiana Jones is standing at the opening in the cliff and faces a chasm. He rolls his eyes and says “A leap of faith!” Then he takes a breath and closes his eyes and raises his leg straight out and drops it down and almost stumps when it hits the unseen stone bridge that crosses the chasm. (This is from Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade.)

Being the paradox that I am. I seem to always come up against something where trusting God is required and I will pause. I will look out over the chasm. I will search for some other route. I will explore other possibilities. And then I will close my eyes and take the step. Because ultimately, I do trust God. Now we have go down a road that will seem of subject but to get where I need to be I need to write a few things first.

In philosophy and theology the question of God’s involvement in the world is standard. There are about as many ideas, theories and theologies as there are people who expound them. But when you boil it all down you get to just a few main ones. There is the “God as Divine Puppet Master” that sees God as manipulating creation in order to lead it and us to a particular place. There is the “God as Divine Machine Marker” that sees creation as a wonderful mechanism jumped started by God but then left to evolve as it will without any attention or intervention by God. There is the “Divine Carrot and Stick” God who tests and offers rewards and punishes failures. This is kind of the Puppet Master but more a “Grand Manipulator”. There is the belief that God infuses all creation and this “Divine Cosmic Ingredient” somehow flavors things and make them better, holy, right if we have the eyes to see and hears to hear. Some put forth the idea that everything is just an illusion and that God is the “Divine Magician” that pulls the wool over our eyes and waits for us to discover that it is all illusion. And of course, there is the God that is the “Divine Spoiled Brat” needing us to somehow appease and placate and cater to his/her’s whims and desires in order to receive his/her blessings. And finally, there is the “Capricious God” that we cannot comprehend and all we can do is try to live our lives as best we can while navigating the turmoil of God’s vacillating ways.

I think you can see how all this plays into the conversation of trusting God. Depending on how you understand God the trust you have in God means different things. There is one other way to understand God. It is God as “Divine Companion.” Here God walks with you in life. Not throwing roadblocks or waiting for you to find the correct path. No, God journeys with you; offering support, comfort, nurture, guidance, and a vision of what you and life can be. God as a partner in life’s journey there to go the distance with you but not able to save you from the choices you make or the fickle way life can work. But always there to lend a hand, inspire, challenge, and give you strength to travel on. It is this God that I trust when faced with life’s many and variety options and alternatives. It is this God that I finally and ultimately trust to be the stone bridge that my foot slams into when I take that leap of faith. So, whenever I have a decision to make that has more than a passing impact on my life I do my due diligence and then close my eyes and raise my leg and step out, trusting that God is there.

Dear God, help me to trust in you. Whenever life gets to be too much help me to turn to you. Whenever I find myself unsure help me to know you are there with me as I journey. Thank you for always being ready to support me, guide me, comfort me, and pick me up when I fall. Thank you for our partnership and help me to be faithful in fulfilling my part. Amen.

Sins of Commission and Omission

Good leaders abhor wrongdoing of all kinds; sound leadership has a moral foundation. Good leaders cultivate honest speech; they love advisers who tell them the truth. - Proverbs 16:12-13 (The Message)

With what has come to light over the last day or so about one of the new leadership in our country I got to reflecting on the topic of sin and in particular sins of commission and omission and their impact on trust and what they have to say about moral character.

First what is a sin? I believe sin is something that harms your connection with God, self, others, and creation. It is something you have done or said that adversely affects others. It is also the things you don’t do or say when refraining from saying or doing harms those same connections. Sins of commission are those sins that we commit that we know were wrong and that we regret doing or saying. Sins of omission are the things we fail to say or do that we also know are wrong but that we really don’t regret because we think we get away with them. These are like being asked if you had any contact with Russian officials during the campaign and you answer “no” because you are thinking that the question had to do with contact as a part of the campaign when you were in touch because of another role you fulfill. You know the intent of the question but you think by omitting the information you have done nothing wrong because you weren’t in contact because of the campaign.

It is very easy to fall into this trap of sins of omission. We humans like to play the game of “You didn’t ask me that specifically.” You know how it goes, you more than likely played it when you were younger, maybe a teenager and your folks asked you a question and because it wasn’t specific enough you gave an answer they would want to hear instead of owning up to the reality that you were guilty. Technicalities are what we call them and boy are we good at working them when it saves our bacon. The problem with using technicalities is that when it becomes obvious that you did it, or knew it, or were aware of it your morals and ethics become suspect. People can’t trust that what you say and do fits with who you are and what you profess. In some ways, I think these sins of omission are much more damaging than sins of commission.

When I have sinned and I own up to it and pledge to do better I am showing my true self. I am admitting my flaws and shortcomings and promising to do better. My moral and ethical self is reflected in my willingness to admit my sin and to sincerely try and do better. When I have sinned because of conscious omission I have already brought into question my morals and ethics. To let a technicality supersede my truthful owning up to something is to make myself suspect. I have violated trust because I have deliberately chosen to use that technicality knowing that it will free me from omitting what I have done and suffering any consequences of that action.

When someone lets themselves off the hook in these ways and they are found out we can’t help but ask, “What else aren’t they telling us? What others questions did they skirt because of a technicality? Why should I believe them next time?” And this is why I think sins of omission are more damaging. They break the bond of trust and force you to reexamine the sinner to see where else they might have omitted what they should have owned. Entering into a contract with someone knowing that you will not fulfill your part is a sin of omission. Calculating the risk and cost of cutting a corner and finding that risk and cost acceptable is a sin of omission. Attacking the character of another to deflect scrutiny of yourself is a sin of omission.

I want someone who has done something wrong, immoral, or unethical to admit it and promise to do better. I don’t want someone who has done something wrong to find a loophole or a technicality so that they don’t have to admit the wrongdoing claiming innocence. When they do I must question everything else they have said and done and I cannot trust them in the future. It is a simple as that. Sin, admit it and promise to do better shows some moral and ethical commitment. Fail to say or do something or say or do something but find a way to not have to own saying or doing it shows lack of moral character and questionable ethics and lose my trust.

God, help me to own up to my sin. Help me to say and do what you need me to say and do everywhere and every time. And when I fail forgive me and help me do better next time. Amen.

Turn On, Tune In, Drop Out

Just make sure you stay alert. Keep close watch over yourselves. Don't forget anything of what you've seen. Don't let your heart wander off. Stay vigilant as long as you live. Teach what you've seen and heard to your children and grandchildren. - Deuteronomy 4:9 (The Message)

Ok so we are a month into the challenges of a new administration. We have been assaulted on many fronts and the rumors and rhetoric are swirling around like a tornado. There have been marches, protests, letters, petitions, calls to elected officials, and all sorts of actions taken. We have prayed for immigrants, Muslims, Jews, militants, refugees, people of color, women, and even the President and his administration. And for the most part things are still turbulent and chaotic with no end to this ride in sight. I am beginning to hear people say things that make me think they are tired and ready to just pull back and cover up like a turtle retreating into its shell. I get it. I feel that way at times too. I have been remembering a slogan from my youth: “Turn on, tune in, drop out.” I have been feeling the temptation to follow this advice.

So, I had to remind myself of where that phrase came from and what it meant to see if I really want to live by its intent. It came from the late great Timothy Leary in 1966 when he said it at a press conference. Here is the quote: Like every great religion of the past we seek to find the divinity within and to express this revelation in a life of glorification and the worship of God. These ancient goals we define in the metaphor of the present — turn on, tune in, drop out. ("Transcript". American Experience documentary on the Summer of Love. PBS and WGBH. 2007-03-14.)

He later explained what it meant in his 1983 autobiography: "Turn on" meant go within to activate your neural and genetic equipment. Become sensitive to the many and various levels of consciousness and the specific triggers that engage them. Drugs were one way to accomplish this end. "Tune in" meant interact harmoniously with the world around you – externalize, materialize, express your new internal perspectives. "Drop out" suggested an active, selective, graceful process of detachment from involuntary or unconscious commitments. "Drop Out" meant self-reliance, a discovery of one's singularity, a commitment to mobility, choice, and change. Unhappily my explanations of this sequence of personal development were often misinterpreted to mean "Get stoned and abandon all constructive activity". (Timothy Leary, Flashbacks: A Personal and Cultural History of an Era pg. 253)

Given what Timothy Leary said it meant I think I can safely quote it and adopt it as part of my way of coping with things. In order to survive and thrive in the present situation I must “turn on” my spiritual connections with God, Christ, creation and other people. I should pay attention to my soul and my psyche keeping both engaged and exercised so that they are functioning at their peak. Doing this will help me “tune in.” That is find and become active in the places and programs, actions and activities that externalize, make manifest, and show to the world my connection to God and God’s values. And of course, I can then “drop out.” I can commit to choice and change and discover how combining my connection with God to those of others we can mobilize and alter the world. In “dropping out” I can comfortably forgo giving the present leadership a chance, waiting for things to shake out, and shutting out all that makes me uneasy because I am coming at the world from my connections with God, self and others and know that what I am saying and doing comes from God.

I am fearful that many kind, caring, progressive people who want to protect others, save the planet, and make things right will get too tired and apathic and adopt that misinterpretation of this quote and just “get stoned and abandon all constructive activity.” We cannot let that happen. We cannot fall into that trap. For once we give up. Once we stop calling for change. Once we halt our marches and stop signing petitions and sending our elected officials emails, and demanding they address our issues at town hall meetings evil wins. We must remain vigilant so that our children and grandchildren, neighbors and friends, strangers and enemies all know what is right and good and decent. So as combat troops say to one another, “Stay frosty my friends.”

Dear God, help me to remain vigilant. Help me to stay connected to you, creation, myself and others. Help us all to stay frosty. And help those most traumatized by what is happening in our nation and world. Amen.

Being Prepared

…if the owner of the house had known in what part of the night the thief was coming, he would have stayed awake and would not have let his house be broken into. - Matthew 24:43 (NRSV)

I met this morning with one of the leaders of the Neighborhood Emergency Team for the Hayhurst area. The church is a staging site in the case of an emergency. It got me to thinking about being prepared for that Big One (the earth quake that is due in this area) and other disasters natural and human caused. Am I prepared for whatever might come my way? Is it even possible to be prepared?

I know that there is a standard basic emergency kit that everyone from the CDC to Homeland Security to the Red Cross recommend you put together for your home and office and car and for each person in those locations. I know that a lot of what is on that list I have around my house and office. I also know that the most important stuff may not be there at all (enough water, work gloves, etc.). And I know that it is spread out which can be a problem in a disaster. You can purchase kits and food supplies (some of which is guaranteed to have a 25-year shelf life). You can get kits for your car, for your home, for you to carry with you at all times. You can subscribe to a service that will send you more gear and supplies each month so that you will never have to worry about having the right stuff. There is even a sub-culture known as “preppers” who make every effort to have whatever they might need to survive the end of civilization. And our Mormon friends have this whole survival and shelter thing covered with detailed manuals complete with scriptural references.

I guess that I really need to put that kit together, spend the money, and make a schedule for rotating supplies and medications. I really don’t have any good reason not to. I surely am not one of those religious fanatics that will climb up the nearest mountain, spread my arms wide, and sing “glory hallelujah” embracing the end as if it was the culmination of God’s divine plan. In case you didn’t get it, I do not believe in some end of the world, apocalyptic Day of the Lord preordained by God to bring all creation to an end. I do believe that disasters happen, that a living planet like ours has destructive moments, and that humans can and do cause very bad things to happen that threaten life as we know it. So, I know that I need to be prepared for some disaster to strike.

But there are other disasters that can’t be prepare for by assembling a kit of first aid supplies, work gloves, food, and water. I also know that accompanying disasters of the physical kind are emotional and spiritual disasters. If – nope that’s wrong – when the Big One strikes I know that my psyche and my spirit will be traumatized. So, I need to prepare for that as well. I can include some items to help in my kits – a Bible, perhaps a notebook of quotes and sayings, maybe a candle or a rock or something physical that has helped me in my spiritual practices. I might want to include a game, cards, or something that can take my mind off things for a little while. Maybe a set of prayer beads would be good. And always I need to keep in my mind at least passages like “God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth should change, though the mountains shake in the heart of the sea; though its waters roar and foam, though the mountains tremble with its tumult.” (Psalms 46:1-3 NRSV). And “For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor rulers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.” (Romans 8:38-39 NRSV).

So, this weekend I will dig out of the attic an empty storage container. I will begin to gather up supplies for my emergency kit. I will make my plans, figure out how to remind myself to rotate my supplies and get myself a little more prepared for what will, eventually, come. I will also work at my spiritual practices, because even if all my stuff is gone I can rely on the practices that have, are, and will see me through.

Help me O God, to be prepared in mind, body and spirit for the disasters that come. Give me strength of will and spirit to face whatever comes. Help me to prepare for whatever life may bring. Thank you for being a safe harbor in the storms of life. Amen.

The Rule of Law

Bring me a coin and let me look at it." They handed him one. "This engraving—who does it look like? And whose name is on it?" "Caesar," they said. Jesus said, "Give Caesar what is his, and give God what is his." - Mark 12:15-17 (The Message)

Be a good citizen. All governments are under God. Insofar as there is peace and order, it's God's order. So live responsibly as a citizen. - Romans 13:1 (The Message)

We will be hearing a lot about “the rule of law” as we head further into the new administration of the US government’s executive branch. Mostly it will be spoken by those who are rallying against what that administration is trying to do. I spent last evening at the Muslim Educational Trust event “MET Emergency Forum! Understanding Justice and Equality for All Through the Strength of Law and Compassion.” It is clear that many challenges to what the administration is doing will be relying on the standard of the rule of law. So, this got we musing; what do we mean by the rule of law and what do I do with Biblical passages like these two that seem to be telling me that it is my duty as a faithful person to support the civil authority?

Let’s begin with the rule of law. Here is what that phrase means in a nut shell (From the website: http://worldjusticeproject.org/what-rule-law):

Derived from internationally accepted standards, the World Justice Project’s definition of the rule of law is a system in which the following four universal principles are upheld:

1.       The government and its officials and agents as well as individuals and private entities are accountable under the law.

2.       The laws are clear, publicized, stable, and just; are applied evenly; and protect fundamental rights, including the security of persons and property and certain core human rights.

3.       The process by which the laws are enacted, administered, and enforced is accessible, fair, and efficient.

4.       Justice is delivered timely by competent, ethical, and independent representatives and neutrals who are of sufficient number, have adequate resources, and reflect the makeup of the communities they serve.

In other words, it is what I think most of us assume to be the way things work in these United States of America – at least that is the goal and we try hard to meet it. It means the courts are independent of other branches of government and to some extend of each other. That no person, even the President, is outside the law. And that actions by government agencies and officials are subject to the rule of law and can be overturned, modified, restricted, or labeled illegal. This applies to Executive Orders, policies, directives, and any other tool anyone in government can use.

Ok now to these pesky passages. When wrestling with the Bible I usually begin with Jesus and when it comes to the gospels I always go to Mark first since it is the oldest gospel and a source for Matthew and Luke. This passage from chapter 12 about paying taxes has been deemed authentic by the Jesus Seminar. (It was organized in 1985 to renew the quest of the historical Jesus and to report the results of its research to the general public. The goal of the Seminar was to review each of the sayings and deeds attributed to Jesus in the gospels and determine which of them could be considered authentic. More than 200 professionally trained specialists, called Fellows, joined the group at various phases. These Fellows represent a wide array of Western religious traditions and academic institutions. They have been trained in the best universities in North America and Europe. The Seminar met twice a year to debate technical papers that were prepared and circulated in advance. At the close of debate on each agenda item, Fellows voted using colored beads to indicate the degree of authenticity of the words and deeds attributed to Jesus in the gospels.  From the website: https://www.westarinstitute.org/projects/the-jesus-seminar/). I believe that Jesus really did say something akin to this which means I have an obligation to civil authority. When I bring Paul into the conversation and his words from Romans I must hear them in light of what Jesus said which leaves me again at the place of being obligated to adhere to civil authority. So, what do I do when what the civil authority is saying and doing does not fit with my understanding of the rule of law and with the character and values of God?

Paul Achtemier in the Interpretation: A Bible Commentary for Teaching and Preaching: Romans writes: “Both passages make clear that one has an obligation to civil authorities…as well as to God…the obligation to human authorities who rule for the purpose of restraining evil in human society, and promoting good, may not be ignored…Obedience to civil authority is a Christian duty, but it is to be exercised within the framework of the Christian‘s more far-reaching commitment of obedience to God.” What I take this to mean is that I have an obligation to critically access what the civil authority is doing and determine if it is restraining evil and promoting good. When it is, I am to support said authority. When it is not, I am obliged to act based upon my commitment to God and God’s values and will.

In the context of the rule of law then I feel that when an act, decree, executive order, etc. violates this standard it has stopped restraining evil and promoting good and therefore I am obligated by my faith and my partnership with God and Christ to do what I can to keep that decree or order from being executed. I am to disobey the civil authority because it isn’t functioning as it should.

You can say I am rationalizing. You can accuse me of playing fast and loose with the Bible. But for me, for my understanding of the faith, of what it is God values, of what is the character of God and Christ, and what my obligation is to God and civil authority I must stand in opposition to civil authority when it fails to restrain evil and promote good. As Martin Luther famously said when he was brought to trial for heresy, “I cannot and will not recant anything, for to go against conscience is neither right nor safe. Here I stand, I can do no other, so help me God. Amen.”

Dear God, be with our president and other elected leaders. Guide them as you can to have the overriding goal for all they do be the restraining of evil and promoting of good. Be with all those who experience the civil authority promoting evil and restraining good. Be with us all as we try to determine where it is we stand, how much obligation we have to civil authority, and how far we must go when we oppose what that authority is doing. Give me the strength of conviction to risk for your sake. Amen.

R-E-S-P-E-C-T

Pay to all what is due them—taxes to whom taxes are due, revenue to whom revenue is due, respect to whom respect is due, honor to whom honor is due. Owe no one anything, except to love one another; for the one who loves another has fulfilled the law. Romans 13:7-8 (NRSV)

Leadership gains authority and respect when the voiceless poor are treated fairly. Proverbs 29:14 (The Message)

I have been reading and hearing a lot about respect these days. In particular, about how some people are suppose to respect the office or respect the tradition or respect the occasion. People are challenging members of congress who are choosing to forgo attendance at the inauguration saying they should respect the event, respect the office of president, etc. I have heard people say that we should respect the president-elect because he is the president-elect. I have heard folks say that we need to figure out how to respect others who hold different opinions. I have heard people say that they aren’t respected. And I was taught that you respect those in positions of authority, your elders, clergy, teachers, etc.

What exactly are we talking about when we are talking about “respect?” I always turn to the dictionary when I start to wrestle with a word and what it means. Respect, noun, a feeling of deep admiration for someone or something elicited by their abilities, qualities, or achievements: the state of being admired or respected; due regard for the feelings, wishes, or rights of others. The next place I turn is to the Thesaurus. Synonyms for respect are: admiration, deference, esteem, reverence, veneration.

So, to respect someone means that you admire them, recognize their abilities, qualities, and achievements; and have regard for them. I think a quote my dad use to throw about but that I’m sure never know who said it has something to say in this discussion: “Treat people the way you want to be treated. Talk to people the way you want to be talked to. Respect is earned, not given.”  Hussein Nishah (I think this is Shah Hussain a Punjabi Sufi poet of the 16^th century CE but could not find a definitive connection).

For me, respect is a basic human right in that every person deserves to be respected – to have others give due regard for their rights, to be seen as human, etc. But the respect that folks are calling for regarding “the office” or “the tradition” or “their new position” is not this basic respect. It is the respect that is earned. The respect that comes from an admiration for a person’s abilities, qualities and achievements. I cannot judge another and I sure won’t try and figure out if they respect someone else in this way. But if someone chooses to not participate in an event, it has to do with respect but the kind that is earned.

The time of respect for an office, a title, a role, a job, etc. has passed. Whether it was because of the 1960’s “Don’t trust anyone over 30.” Or Watergate, or Roman Catholic priests sex abuse scandal or too many PhD’s who abused their degree, or other such things all I know is that this is gone. Now people need to know what you stand for, what you value, how you treat others, etc. before they will respect you. They must see that your actions and words are the same. They can’t rely on a degree or an office they must know you. I must say that it is possible and even important to respect people who believe differently than you. But they still must pass the abilities and qualities test. They must be decent people who treat others with the basic respect due us all.

I’m not sure this is making a lot of sense. I know what I mean, I’m not sure it’s what I’ve written. I seem to be rambling or having a tough time focusing so I will end this Musing. I’m not sure this loss of respect for a role, title, etc. is a good thing. I’m also not sure that it is a bad thing. But it is the reality of our culture at this time. So, give everyone the basic respect they are due and keep an open mind so that folks can earn your respect.

Dear God, help me respect all people. Help me to say and do things that match. Help me be someone that others can respect. Help all of us to be people that others respect. Amen.

Waiting

I am weary with my crying; my throat is parched. My eyes grow dim with waiting for my God. Psalms 69:3 (NRSV)

I feel like I am waiting. I’m not sure what I am waiting for. Maybe the end of the world? No, that’s to dramatic and I don’t think I am waiting for this, in fact I tend to think it can’t happen because we will not let it happen. Am I waiting for a divine bolt of lightning to strike my heart and soul and inspire me to grand, lofty spiritual accomplishments? I think not. It feels more like waiting in my car in the Cell Phone Waiting area at the airport. I know something is coming, and I know it is coming on the sooner side I just don’t know exactly when it will arrive. I also don’t have a clear idea of what will be arriving.

I know a component of this is that I am waiting for those in leadership to begin to offer direction and insight. I can only do so much to impact and influence the direction of things, others in positions of leadership and authority also need to do things and I am waiting for them to do that.

I know a part of this waiting is trying to figure out how to make the biggest difference I can in the immediate future as our nation falls into a deeply troubling time. I am not sure how to employ my limited energy and resources for the maximum affect so I am waiting and working on this.

There is also a waiting for God mixed in to all this. Throughout my life, I have found that at critical moments I get into this waiting and one of the things I am waiting for is some inspiration, direction, insight or nudge from God. I cannot remember a time when I have felt the way I feel that a metaphorical voice from heaven hasn’t been a part of moving me along.

I wish I could tell you that I have this elaborate ritual of serious spiritual discerning, time in contemplation and deep prayer that centers me and opens me to hearing the voice of God and finding what I have been waiting for. Well I don’t have these things, or at least not in any real traditional sense. I give myself permission to just sit and gaze out the window. I allow for some time for music and arts to speak to me. I go to the Japanese Garden and the Chinese Garden and just walk around. I reflect on what I have been reading, watching, and paying attention to. I let the invitations to conferences, training events, etc. come and maybe spark an interest in me. Basically, I just wait.

And I don’t like waiting. The hardest thing for me to do is wait for a particular time to arrive before I can do what I need to do. I really find it hard to just wait without a clear and definitive end point for the waiting. I don’t like waiting without knowing what I am waiting for. And yet I am deeply enmeshed in a vocation and institution that requires just this kind of waiting. My tradition is a tradition of waiting. Waiting for inspiration, insight, guidance, direction; waiting for the voice of God.

I know that these times of waiting are often followed by something significant. It could be in my personal life. It might be in my pastoral ministry with my present congregation. I could be a call to go to a new place. And I could be a shove to delve deeper into who I am and what God needs and wants from me. What it is just isn’t clear yet. So, I wait. It can come relatively quickly or it can take months, even a couple years to become clear. And this is part of why I don’t like this waiting. But the truth is I can do nothing else because I have learned that there is no way to push, manipulate, or force this waiting to end. It just must take whatever time it needs and I have to just wait for it.

And so I wait.

Dear God, help me to wait for you. Help me to be at peace as I wait. Help me to be open to the ways you communicate with me. Amen.